The Power of Saying Yes : A True “Right-to-Life” Story

The Power of Saying Yes : A True “Right-to-Life” Story

This post has been weighing on my heart for some time. One might wonder how I can go from pet burial practices to this in the course of 24 hours, but that’s just how my mind works. Some days I think heavy. Some days I think about how amazing lip balm is. Thanks for choosing to follow along anyway.

I can’t imagine how frightening it must have been.

Pregnant for the second time in five years.

Unmarried.

Alone.

That chick was fertile, that’s for sure. And perhaps a bit lost.

But nevertheless, she said yes.

Yes to my life.

Baby Hand

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She could have said no. She could have terminated me the moment she knew I was there: it was not yet legal, but there were ways.

She didn’t.

She could have said no to months of discomfort. No to the lies she would eventually choose to tell her parents as her belly grew. No to the inconvenience of being with child when she had no husband to walk beside her through the emotional highs and lows of a pregnancy. There’s no doubt it was not the situation she’d hoped for herself, and any one of those reasons could be overwhelming to a young girl.

But she was brave.

She said yes to 9 months of sacrifice, which at the time, may have felt like forever.

And when it was over, and she signed me away, I bet she thought her yes was done.

But that yes was like a stone skipping across the water for the ripples it created. The joy from it continues.

It led to the love I’ve known all my life. To notes I wrote to my other mother when she was at choir practice at night, reminding her how much I loved her, and to me waking up to find a love note in return.

It led to afternoons in my grandfather’s living room, listening to Frank, Tony, and Andy and enjoying Nonnu’s company.

It led to friends from my youth who’ve aged gracefully {and beautifully} along side me, and to newer ones I’ve grown to love like I’ve known them just as long.

It led to my meeting a man I adore—one who makes me laugh like no other and who appreciates a crooner just about as much as I do {what were the chances?}.

It led to The Boy. It led to The Boy.

It led to The Boy.

Really, need I say more?

Perhaps she never thinks of me now. Perhaps she does.

Either way, I hope she has no regrets.

It may now feel like just a small moment in time for her, but to me, well, she took that sacrifice and spun it into gold.

All because she said yes.

Love Lets Live | Abort73.com

 

Empowering Our Children Through Disappointment

Empowering Our Children Through Disappointment

I just heard a report on the evening news about a single mother who complained enough about the father/daughter dance at her child’s school that she got it banned.

I’m speechless.

Wait, I’m not.

Are we creating survivors of our children—are we empowering them to overcome the hardships they may face in life—or are we coddling them against things that might sting a little at the time, but will ultimately teach them valuable lessons?

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I can surely sympathize with this woman.

She’s hurting for her daughter and hoping to take that hurt away, but to do so, she took away a thing of joy to many others.  The world just shouldn’t work that way. It doesn’t work that way, and we can’t give our children the false impression otherwise.

We have them for 18 short years, and in that time, we’ve got to love, protect—and, sure, maybe spoil ’em a teeny bit—but ultimately our job is to prepare our children for life.

Real life.

We need to guide them to become independent and capable adults: helping them develop an inner strength goes hand-in-hand with that goal.

Quite often, life is unfair.

Quite often, it’s messy and it makes our hearts ache.

Quite often, Little Suzy Yahoo has something Little Sarah Sweetie doesn’t, and Sarah Sweetie has to learn to persevere. She will be stronger for it. She will have character.

What is the lesson that little girl would learn, you ask?

I’m not sure.

Maybe it’s that even though her dad’s not present—for whatever unfortunate reason—there are men in her life who love her and can step in.

Or maybe it’s that while she may be disappointed that she won’t attend this particular event, she can spend some special time with her loving mom doing something else instead.

I’m sure everyone wishes this little one had a daddy to escort her. I certainly do, but this is the hand she’s been dealt, and her mom needs to help her play it with strength and grace.

What do you think, my friends?

I’ll Worry About That Tomorrow

I used to plague myself with worry over things I couldn’t control. It was a bad habit I’d developed since as far back as I could remember, and it followed me through my youth, my early twenties, and the first years of my marriage.

It lasted until the worst thing that I’d ever had happen to me happened, and after that, I seemed to gain a better perspective on what to sweat and what not to, and I was able to cope with anxiety a little better.

A few weeks back a friend was shaken up by some scary news, and was trying to figure out how to navigate her way through the anxiety, and in my effort to help her regain some calm, I shared with her one of my favorite “how to deal” tricks.

First, you need to channel your inner Scarlett O’Hara. She’s the one I took this from, after all.

It helps me when I’ve got something heavy on mind which I KNOW I can’t do anything about, other than to just let The Good Lord handle it in His own time and in His own way {which, of course, should always be Step 1 of any “How To Deal” plan}:

I schedule my worry.

Yup, I schedule it.

You know how Scarlett O’Hara makes that big statement toward the end of Gone with the Wind when she says “Oh, I won’t worry about that today; I’ll worry about that tomorrow.” That’s exactly what I do, inspired by that scene. I put it on the calendar as if marking it down as a “to do” serves the purpose of my anxiety, and then I tell myself I’ll tackle that tomorrow. When tomorrow comes around, I push the task off until the next day, as soon as it comes to my mind. So it’s not like I’m NOT worrying {which in my weird mind serves a purpose}, it’s just that I’m not worrying RIGHT NOW, and I’m freeing myself up to focus on the precious moments at hand.

 

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Get what I’m saying? When you have the conscious thought of “Holy smokes! This is scaring me … let me start to obsess!,” acknowledge it, give it a moment of respect, then hand it right on over to God, and mark it on your calendar physically for another time if you need to: “Wednesday, October 2, 3 pm … PANIC!” When that time rolls around, do the same thing. When that’s done, complete the ritual with a prayer:

God, this is royally FREAKING me out! I can’t handle the fear and anxiety and unknown of it all, so please take this burden from me, and work it out according to Your Will. As always, things are best left in Your hands. Amen.

Try it. It may work for you as well as it always has for me.

When life’s got you a little crazy, how do you deal?

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